Beijos é Abraços : Kisses and Hugs in Brazil

I have yet to master the art of “cumprimentos” or greetings in Brazil. I remember getting used to it during my trip in 2006, but after 2 years of Seattle greetings, I’m consistently messing it up over here. As far as I can tell, the following is considered normal: - When entering a group (sitting down for dinner, for example) you greet everyone. The same goes for when you leave. - Men give men a kind of half hug and a pat on the shoulder, chest or back. - Men meeting men for the first time give some sort of secret handshake that appears to change from location to location. This is followed by a pat on the chest/shoulder. - Men and women greet and meet women with two kisses on either cheek. Left side first. I wouldn’t usually have problems with something like this but I can’t seem to get it straight. A lot of times I’m paying attention to names (which are harder to hear and remember than in English) or making sure I understand what people are saying. Last night I went for the two kisses a couple times, but it seemed that one kiss on the left was all that was expected. I was left with my neck sticking out like a turkey waiting to be decapitated. The other day, I forgot the pat on the chest after greeting my friend’s dad, and caught him awkwardly on the peck when I tried to correct the error. I always get the man-hug wrong. I go for the front-to-front, and it’s really a side-to-side embrace, which is rarely seen in the States. I’m working on it. The other night I was awkwardly introducing myself to some girls and forgot what I was doing and stuck out my hand for a handshake. It felt so cold and wrong. Especially for them because most times upon greeting people don’t know I’m not Brazilian. So far, I’ve gotten (Baiano (north brazilian), Argentinian (what?), Portuguese, and plain old Brasileiro). In other news, I’ve discovered my skin does, in fact, burn. I’m 10 shades darker than when I arrived. Life on the beach is good, and today I’m in Florianopolis. A land of gorgeous people.